Miracles

We've all heard the saying, "Miracles happen" right? You never think a miracle will ever happen to you, they always happen to other people, and it is amazing to hear the stories. When a miracle actually does happen to you, you are beside yourself in total awe of our amazing God.

Most of you know our story.... Tom's battle with melanoma skin cancer (currently 2 1/2 yrs cancer free - yeah!!), and the fact that we had to deposit our assets, between his surgery and chemo, to ensure a family some day. And you've heard about my battle with PCOS, and the three tries we've done of artificial insemination with 1 miscarriage (Dec 06). All of this is the reason I started my business with The Pampered Chef, to save money so we could go forward with InVitro fertilization (IVF). We hadn't told anyone this, but we did have an appt scheduled for Oct 18th last year to go see Dr. Sherban in Gurnee, IL... but when I lost my KC job on Oct 17th, that put a huge damper on our plans.

This just killed me, after everything we've been thru and now it seems another road block. I can't even begin to express the emotional rollercoaster we've been on. I am really good at holding things back from people so that all they see is the happy-Roxanne-things-are-fine exterior. As many times as people would give baby-making advice, I have to admit-- it got old....heard it once, heard it a thousand times.... "once you stop trying, it will happen." Well, sorry to bust your bubble folks, it's not that easy, and no, I do not believe in that myth. If you have never dealt with infertility, and cancer, I'm sorry, but you just couldn't possibly know what it is like. We all know the definitions of the words "sympathize" and "empathize". We thank all of you for your love and support through our difficulties, and we know we have the most amazing, caring and loving family and friends. We are so greatful God has blessed us with each of you.

So I'll just cut to the chase here.... you probably have a clue what I am getting at. As I said in the beginning of this post, "When a miracle actually does happen to you, you are beside yourself in total awe of our amazing God." Yes, people, WE ARE PREGNANT!!!!!!!!! This gift of life is totally, and utterly, 100-million-percent GOD's work. We did not do IVF, I was not giving myself fertility shots, it is a complete miracle!

We all know "how" this happens, but here is my little personal theory on WHY:

I finally accepted the fact that this wasn't going to be easy. I accepted what we've been through and the fact that if we were ready to pay thousands upon thousands of dollars and go through the physical and emotional rollercoaster. That having a child was worth it and definately something we both so badly want, to share our love and our life together. I accepted it wasn't going to be easy, and I was at peace with us, with God, with our little situation. Acceptance.

So if you are trying, and someone says to you "If you stop trying, it will happen." You don't have to believe it. My theory when it is right with you and God, it will happen. He is the one making the calls, not you or I. And that's the truth. Have faith. We did, and now we get to share this miracle with the world! World, I hope you are ready for another SCHWANDT!!!!!

We are 9 1/2 weeks along, as of today. The Dr said Baby is healthy, and everything looks really good. We have nothing to worry about. This baby IS GOING TO COME! Est Due Date is December 25, 2008. I can't think of a better due date - Jesus' Birthday - for our little miracle. :)